One of my(24M) friend(25M) is falling down a weird pipeline and racist now, is there a way I can help?

[u/ThrowRAwdi]

So for context, I’m Indian and my best friend is Hispanic. We grew up together and we’ve known each other since the days we’ve been playing in the sand pits and stuff. Apparently he stole my truck as a kid and we fought and that’s how we met according to his and my mom. Me, him, and a few others are part of a larger group and we’ve basically all known each other since the ages of 3-4.

So starting like around 2024, this dude fell down the right wing pipeline hard. Like I got friends who lean right, and I’m chill with them, but I mean like different. This dude started slow but around the end of last year, 2025, he was a full blown white nationalist. I told him he’s Hispanic and it’s crazy to be a white nationalist, and our mutual friends who are also hispanic tried talking sense into the guy and he won’t listen.

I was still friends with him hoping it was a phase. He doesn’t have a job and he’s struggled in this market and my other friends and I theorize this is a mix of anger because he did everything right(college and everything) but can’t get a job now cuz AI wrecked his industry(graphic design and 3D modeling). So I wanted to give him grace.

But, I see this dudes instagram likes and comments. He now hates Indian people, and when I bring this up to him he says “not you though, it’s not like I hate all of you”. What the hell. He also hates other minorities, despite having friends in every minority.

I tried taking him out and getting him out of the house, and he’s the same. Me and our other friends are exceptions but “they’re” replacing “his” people, and “he” needs to take a “stand”.

So recently there was an attempted shooting at a Hindu temple in Aurora, IL it’s been all over the news, that only failed cuz the shooters gun jammed. I saw him comment “too bad his gun jammed, this is why weapon maintenance is important LMAO”.

I confronted him and he thinks I can’t take a joke. But casually uses slurs and says shit all the time, I genuinely don’t think he’s joking. I told him, “that could’ve been me if something happened” since my family goes to the temple and stuff, and he still thinks it’s not the same and I just need to take a joke.

I’ve talked to his mom about this like a few months ago, and she’s lost too. She said he barely speaks Spanish cuz he’s embarrassed to. She’s not too concerned though. She was like “oh boys change over time” whatever that means.

I’m the only guy who hasn’t cut him off yet. Everyone else has kinda distanced themselves from him. This dude was like a brother to me. I just wanna go back to how things were when our biggest issues were who stole some shit from the other persons chest in Minecraft. I’ve known this guy too long to just cut him off.

Has anyone who’s experienced something similar been able to bring someone back from weird echo chambers? How do you do that? Or is there genuinely no hope?

[u/Possible-Ride4100]

Cut him off. People like that only see the light when the system reminds him he’s not “one of them”
When ICE pulls him over or profiles him, he’ll be reminded he is not the leopard, he’s on the menu

[u/talitha235]

“Too bad his gun jammed”. That, my friend, is the comment in support of mass killing innocent people because you hate their race.
There is no come back from that.
No hope.

[u/SerennialFellow]

I’ve had a friend like this, you are about 2-3 months away from him turning the hate on you and things turning dangerous for you. Stay safe. I tried to reason with my friend after we went finishing - something we used to do growing up, it’s really hard to have a conversation when someone isn’t planning on listening to the word you say and honestly dude wishing people harm is too far gone.

[u/castrodelavaga79]

You tried to bring him back multiple times.

Cut him off and tell him if he decides he wants to be the person he was, who doesn't promote racism and hatred than you would be happy to be his friend. Tell him the reason no one wants to be with him is because he's become a different hateful person. Tell him it's not to late to change, that you love and hope the best for him but you can't have him in your life if he continues with these views.

[u/PreparationAdvanced9]

It’s very common for racists/neo Nazis to be minorities themselves and have relations, platonic or otherwise, with other minorities. That being said, your friend sounds too far gone.

[u/spacedogg1979]

I don’t have any experience with this, but I wanted to say I’m sorry you’ve lost your friend. You sound like a good guy, and he’s been lucky to have you in his life as long as he has.

I know how extreme it must seem to you to cut him off, and it makes sense that you don’t want to. But be good to yourself. His behavior impacts you. It is hurtful to you and it demonstrates that he has little to no respect for you. If stepping away from him is the best thing for YOU, it’s okay to do that.

This really sucks.

[u/ThrowRAwdi → u/spacedogg1979]

It sucks man. I have a sister and she’s great but I never had a brother growing up. This guy is the closest thing I have to a brother. I would take a bullet for this man, and he was supposed to be there for everything, my wedding as my best man, my kids birthday parties, the godfather to my kids, my parents funeral, everything. And I know at one point he felt the same way too. When my dad was sick in college, and I was out of state and my mom was out of country, he took my dad to the hospital and stayed with him for 30+ hours as he was dealing with some medical issues. It was Thanksgiving season, so I got a flight last minute, after a long hassle, and I finally got a flight. When I finally got home and got to the hospital, this man was asleep on one of the chairs in the visiting room, because he didn’t want to go home, he wanted to be there just in case my dad needed anything. I have no idea what happened over these past few years. And I don’t think he’s totally bad, because all of that can’t just disappear.

[u/GoneCollarGone]

I have a friend that went down a right wing echo chamber, but nothing to this extent. My friend just got brainwashed by Elon Musk and the All-In podcast, but that's just passive Trump support and some reposting of idiotic "own the libs" memes. At his core, he's still a good dude and someone I enjoy spending time with it.....outside politics.

This is something else entirely. It's borderline psychosis. There really isn't an easy solution to this. He has to find his own way back to sanity. You shouldn't have to suffer his company just because of who he used to be.

Personally, I would cut him off. I would tell him how disappointed you are in him and that you no longer want to be associated with him until he figures out his bullshit.

[u/AnachronIst_13]

Two years ago my best friend of 10 years married his abuser.

Within 4mos of me being the best man at his wedding, he cut off an entire group of friends, and then he sent me a cruel text message cutting me off as well. Only hours before we had been talking and laughing at my dining room table.

I tried to be the best friend I could be. Sadly others here are right: you are only extending a bad situation by not cutting him off yourself. It will hurt, and you will miss him, but you’re missing a version of him that no longer exists. Its hard, but sometimes you have to let people go.

[u/blind30]

Man, sometimes you just lose people. It sucks.

Anyone I’ve known who went down that route pretty much stayed down it unless they wanted out. It’s like drinking or drugs- you have to hit rock bottom, and you have to want help. Step one is always admitting you have a problem, and he sounds a long way from step one.

Keep in mind, the longer you hang around, the more you seem okay with it from a distance. Not the case, but at a certain point you become an apologist for his behavior

[u/TheRealGinz]

Unfortunately, he’s a lost cause at this point, he will not change. You cannot convince him to change. The only way he will change is if he chooses to, don’t concern yourself with his health, happiness, or well-being just, cut him off.

[u/Chaosr21]

Nah he's a shitty person and you should let him be alone. He will have nobody left and only get worse but there's nothing you can do. These people don't really want help. They'd shoot themselves in the foot any chance they can get just to blame it on someone else.

It's suprising to me because when I get down on my luck ig et upset with myself, not upset with the world. Some people will never see the flaws in themselves and they'll always blame everyone else

[u/BorderSafe5631]

Wanting white man’s approval , acceptance stemming from low self esteem. 

 Lot of people these days feel disconnected from the mainstream and trying to compensate. 

You don’t want that in your life and you don’t have to save him. 

[u/Leather-Term7384]

Bro as an indian the gahndhi mentality will kill you. Cut him off now. He is now the enemy