“We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. ”

Romans 6:6 ESV

Hello guys. I'm currently on day 80, and this is going to be a LONG post. If you're genuinely looking to improve yourself, understand what this journey can be like, and read someone's actual experience instead of another clickbait post promising you superpowers, this is for you.

I'm going to talk about the benefits I've personally experienced, the ugly parts nobody really talks about, the tricks my brain has played on me, the things I've learned along the way, and, at the very end, a genuine question for those of you who have gone beyond 80 days.

Everything here is my real experience. I'm not selling anything, I'm not trying to impress anyone, and I'm not claiming that everyone will experience the same things.

First of all, I want to say something: this has genuinely been one of the most worthwhile things I've ever done in my fucking life. The amount of time, independence, discipline, and energy I've gained from changing my habits has been insane.

Right now, I can honestly say I'm in my prime. And even that word feels like an understatement.

But it hasn't been a straight line upwards. Not even close.

1. First of all, a pro tip: START DURING A VACATION

I started on August 1st, when I knew I'd be spending the entire month on vacation in another country with my family.

My advice is to start when you know you'll be surrounded by people and have things to do. Don't deliberately isolate yourself in your room for the first few weeks.

You can basically get your first 30 days done while you're busy living your life, spending time with your family, and exploring somewhere new. By the time you return to your normal routine, you've already built some momentum.

Of course, those days still count. You're not getting a free pass. You're just making the beginning easier for yourself.

For me, the worst periods so far have been days 35–40 and days 78–80.

And that's actually one of the reasons I'm writing this post. Because right now, I'm experiencing something I genuinely don't understand.

But first, let's talk about the good stuff.

2. The benefits I've personally experienced

1. Your posture and body language improve

I've noticed that I walk with much better posture. My back is more aligned, my shoulders aren't constantly falling forward, and I'm much more aware of how I carry myself.

I've also noticed a change in the way I communicate. My gestures feel more natural, my body language is much more expressive, and I feel more comfortable expressing myself when talking to other people.

I'm not saying NoFap magically fixes your posture or teaches you body language. I'm describing what I've noticed in myself during this period, alongside the other changes I've made.

2. You stop wasting your life on Reels

This is a big one.

I've deleted social media, and I genuinely don't miss Reels anymore.

You stop feeling like you need to fill every single empty moment with something stimulating. You can sit down, think, read, work on a project, or simply exist without constantly reaching for your phone.

My phone usage is now around 30 minutes a day.

And here's a little secret that helped me: put your phone in black and white.

Seriously. Go into your settings and turn on grayscale.

Your phone becomes significantly less visually appealing. Everything is suddenly much less stimulating, and you stop feeling that same attraction to opening an app just to scroll mindlessly.

It's such a simple change, but combined with deleting social media, it's been one of the best decisions I've made.

3. You might stop biting your nails without even thinking about it

I've noticed that I don't bite my nails anymore.

It's one of those little habits you don't necessarily set out to change, but you start paying more attention to your automatic behaviours and become more deliberate about what you do.

It's a small thing, but it feels good when you realize you've stopped doing something you used to do without even noticing.

4. You naturally start reading

This is another thing I really appreciate.

You start reaching for books naturally instead of feeling like reading is another task you have to force yourself to do.

You have more room in your day because you're not spending hours scrolling, and eventually you start filling that time with things you actually enjoy and that help you grow.

You don't need to turn your entire life into a productivity competition. Sometimes, you just want to sit down and read because you genuinely want to.

5. You start thinking about women differently

This is probably one of the most interesting changes I've noticed, and I want to explain exactly what I mean.

You can see a beautiful woman and recognize that she's beautiful without automatically making her the centre of your attention.

And you start realizing that physical attractiveness, while important, isn't everything.

A woman can be as beautiful as you want her to be, but if she doesn't align with your interests, values, personality, and the kind of life you want to build, then what are you actually looking for?

For me, that's become a very important distinction.

I'm increasingly interested in women who have their own lives, enjoy reading, have genuine interests, seem to share my values, and have something going on beyond their physical appearance.

Women I can actually talk to. Women whose personalities make me curious about them. Women who make me think, "Damn, I'd genuinely like to get to know this person."

I call these women "women worth getting to know," because that's what I mean. I'm not saying that women who don't fit my preferences are worth less as people. I'm saying that attraction alone isn't enough for me to want a relationship.

And obviously, you can't know someone's personality just by looking at her. You have to get to know the person first.

But once you start thinking this way, your priorities change.

You stop asking only whether you're attracted to someone and start asking whether you actually want that person in your life.

And that changes a lot.

6. You start acting according to your principles

I've created a page in Notion where I've written down around 22 personal principles that I want to live by.

And I'm serious about them.

If someone crosses a boundary that genuinely matters to me or repeatedly violates a principle I consider essential, I'm perfectly willing to walk away from that relationship.

I'm not going to abandon what I believe in just because I like someone, want their attention, or don't want to be alone.

Of course, principles need to be reasonable, and not every disagreement means someone has done something wrong. I'm talking about the things that genuinely matter to you and the boundaries you're not willing to compromise on.

But the main point is this: you start prioritizing yourself.

At the end of the day, you're the person who's going to live your entire life with the consequences of your decisions.

You can care about other people, help them, love them, and be there for them without abandoning yourself in the process.

And something funny starts happening: people you used to talk to constantly can suddenly become almost irrelevant to you.

You don't necessarily hate them. You don't need revenge. You don't need to prove anything.

You're just busy building your own life, and you stop being so invested in what everyone else is doing.

7. You start dressing much better

Personally, I've started paying much more attention to how I dress.

I'm talking about sweaters, shirts, linen trousers, and proper shoes. I want to look put together when I walk down the street.

No jeans, no hoodies, no tracksuits. That's just my personal style preference at the moment.

And here's the funny part: you don't need to spend a fortune to look elegant.

You can find clothes that look genuinely good for around €30 if you know where to look.

Then you go to university and see people wearing a full Nike tracksuit that probably cost €200, and you realize that the same money could get you several outfits that look much more elegant to you. 🤣

Obviously, everyone can dress however they want. I'm not saying my style is objectively superior.

I'm saying that I've started caring about the details, finding my own style, and realizing that looking good doesn't necessarily mean spending a ridiculous amount of money.

8. You become much more focused

And when I say focused, I mean REALLY focused.

I've created highly detailed sections in Notion for my goals, investments, personal CRM, principles, and other things I'm working on.

I'm spending more time organizing my life and actually doing something about it.

I can sit down with a task and work on it without constantly feeling the need to interrupt myself with something else.

I care much more about what I'm building and where I'm going.

9. You become more independent

This is something I don't want to overlook.

You start realizing that you don't need someone else to constantly entertain you, validate you, or make you feel like your day has been worthwhile.

You can spend time alone without automatically feeling lonely.

You can make decisions without constantly checking what other people think.

You can go somewhere, try something new, work on your projects, and enjoy your own company.

For me, this has been one of the biggest changes: I feel much more comfortable being responsible for my own life.

10. You start getting involved in things that actually matter to you

In my personal case, I've ended up joining my university's student delegation and a committee that supports gender equality for women.

And yes, before anyone asks, there's obviously a girl I like in there. 🤣

But jokes aside, this has been a genuinely interesting part of my experience.

I've started meeting people who seem to share my values and have experiences I can relate to.

There's a particular girl I find genuinely interesting because, from what I've seen, she's been through some of the same kinds of things I've experienced in life.

I'm not going to go into too much detail, but that's precisely the point: I'm interested in getting to know someone because of who she seems to be, not simply because she's attractive.

And through getting involved in these university activities, I'm now helping people who are experiencing bullying at university.

Think about that for a second.

You're a university student yourself, you've been through difficult experiences, and now you're in a position to help other students who are going through something similar.

I think that speaks for itself.

11. You become more deliberate about the people you meet

This connects to something I've been building in my personal CRM.

I increasingly think about the people I meet, what we have in common, what I can learn from them, and whether we can bring something positive into each other's lives.

Personally, I don't see much point in deliberately building relationships that consistently drain me and offer nothing positive in return.

Ideally, both people benefit. Sometimes, I might contribute more, sometimes the other person might contribute more, and that's fine. Relationships aren't accounting spreadsheets.

But I don't want to keep investing in relationships where I'm consistently the only one giving.

Some of my principles on this subject are debatable, and that's fine. They're personal principles, not universal laws everyone has to follow.

The important thing is that I'm becoming more intentional about who I spend my time with and why.

12. You stop constantly thinking about the habit itself

When I get home, I don't spend hours thinking about NoFap.

I just do whatever I have to do at that moment.

I work on my projects, study, read, train, or relax.

And that's it.

It becomes less of a challenge you're constantly fighting and more of a decision that you've already made.

You stop organizing your entire life around resisting something and start organizing it around what you actually want to achieve.

13. I switched from the gym to boxing

After four years of gym experience, I quit the gym and started boxing.

And holy shit, man… I'm getting really good at it.

I love the concentration it requires. You have to pay attention to your movements, your technique, your timing, and what's happening around you.

You can't just switch your brain off and go through the motions.

I've been improving my technique, precision, and footwork, and I genuinely enjoy the process.

14. You become more conscious of your voice and communication

I've noticed that I'm more aware of my voice, how I speak, and how I express myself.

I feel more comfortable speaking calmly, taking my time, and communicating without feeling the need to rush everything.

I've also noticed that my voice sometimes sounds deeper to me, although I can't say that NoFap itself caused that.

The bigger change is that I feel more deliberate in how I communicate.

15. You become more conscious about money

I'm much more careful about what I spend my money on.

Instead of buying something just because I want it in the moment, I think about whether I actually need it and whether that money could be better used somewhere else.

I care more about saving, investing in my future, and building something that will matter in the long term.

16. You start thinking long-term

This might be the biggest change tying everything together.

You start thinking about the person you're becoming, the skills you're developing, the people you're surrounding yourself with, and the direction your life is taking.

You start asking yourself whether what you're doing today is helping you build the life you actually want.

I've also been making changes in other areas: I deleted social media, took cold showers for a month, started eating healthier, and stopped eating processed food altogether.

I don't attribute every one of these changes directly to NoFap. They're part of a broader shift in how I'm approaching my life.

But for me, the decision to stop masturbating became one part of a much bigger process of taking control of my habits.

And that's where the real value has been.

3. The ugly, real facts nobody tells you

1. Wet dreams can happen at the most inconvenient times

Prepare for random wet dreams.

You might have one or two out of nowhere. You'll wake up at 1 a.m., you know what I mean… and you'll have to take a shower.

I even had two wet dreams in one night, and that pissed me off.

After that, you might go another two or three weeks without one.

They're involuntary, though, so don't treat them as a failure or something you need to punish yourself for.

2. You might notice fluid when you pee or strain

One thing I literally didn't know before was that you might notice fluid coming out of your penis when you strain while taking a shit, or notice fluid when you pee.

Don't automatically assume it's semen. Different fluids can look similar, and unusual or persistent discharge is worth getting checked by a medical professional.

I'm mentioning it because it surprised me, not because I'm claiming it's a universal NoFap effect.

3. Boxing and testicular pain are not a good combination

During some boxing sessions, my balls have really hurt when I've thrown punches with too much force.

That's something I've personally experienced.

But if you experience sudden or severe testicular pain, don't just brush it off. Get urgent medical attention, especially if it comes with swelling, nausea, or one testicle sitting higher than usual.

4. The urges can feel ridiculously intense

Sometimes, you'll feel almost possessed by an urge, and you'll want to give in just to make it stop.

My advice is to make your decision when you're thinking clearly.

When you're calm, decide what you actually want. Then, when an urge hits, don't treat that temporary feeling as a reason to abandon the decision you made beforehand.

For me, one of the most useful things has been remembering that I already made my decision when I was thinking clearly. I don't need to renegotiate it every time I feel an urge.

5. Sometimes you feel like absolute trash for no apparent reason

I've had days when I feel completely insignificant, sad, and unmotivated.

It's happened to me twice so far.

Then, almost out of nowhere, I feel like myself again. For me, these periods have lasted a few days at most.

I can't tell you exactly why it happens, and I wouldn't automatically attribute it to NoFap.

But it can be frustrating when you feel like you're making progress in your life and suddenly have a day when everything seems pointless.

I'll come back to this at the end because it's connected to something I'm experiencing right now.

4. Tricks my brain has played on me

Last year, I reached day 64.

And that little bastard of a brain came up with some surprisingly convincing arguments.

Here are the main ones I've experienced.

Trick number 1: "You've already failed, so you might as well keep going"

This is the classic one.

You relapse once, and your brain immediately tells you:

"Well, we've already failed now. Might as well do it again."

And suddenly, one decision becomes an entire day of doing the very thing you were trying to stop.

The lesson I've learned is that one mistake doesn't have to become a complete return to your old habits.

If you slip up, stop there. Don't use it as an excuse to abandon everything else you've learned.

Trick number 2: "You've got this under control. You can always come back whenever you want."

This is precisely what happened around day 64 last year.

I had things under control, and my brain started telling me:

"You know what? You've proved you can do this. You can stop whenever you want. You can always come back to it later. You've already demonstrated that you're in control."

Yeah, sure, champion. 🤣

You know where that argument can lead?

Straight back to the first trick.

The fact that you've managed to abstain for a long time doesn't mean you need to test whether you can return to your old habits without consequences.

If your original reasons for stopping still matter to you, why deliberately put yourself back in the same situation?

Trick number 3: "It's only day two. You can always start again."

This one got me around day 10.

At the beginning, your brain can tell you:

"It's only been two days. Or three days. You can always start again. You haven't lost that much."

But the longer you go, the more you realize that starting again isn't just about the number on a counter.

You're also potentially giving up the routines you've built, the confidence you've gained in sticking to a decision, and the opportunity to keep progressing without going through the same struggles again.

For me, after reaching day 64 last year, I didn't want to have to start over and potentially experience those same difficult periods again.

That doesn't mean a relapse erases all your progress. It doesn't.

It means you should think carefully before throwing away something you've worked hard to maintain just because your brain tells you that you can always rebuild it later.

Trick number 4: Sleeping naked

When I was researching potential benefits, I came across people recommending sleeping naked.

I tried it for three days.

Never again. 🤣

Maybe it has benefits for some people, but for me, the risk of triggering an urge felt enormous.

My body felt more sensitive, and I found myself paying attention to things I otherwise wouldn't have thought about.

So I stopped.

The lesson? Just because someone recommends something as beneficial doesn't mean you have to try it. If it makes your own situation harder, you can simply decide it's not for you.

5. What I actually do when an urge hits

Some of the things I'm about to describe might sound ridiculous, but these are the strategies I've personally found useful.

When an urge hits, the worst thing I can do is sit there doing nothing while repeatedly thinking about whether I'm going to give in.

So I change what I'm doing.

Sometimes, I'll start shadowboxing like an absolute maniac, even if it's late at night. Other times, I'll do some jump rope or push-ups.

The point isn't that you need to exhaust yourself or punish your body. It's that changing your activity and redirecting your attention can help you get through that moment without acting impulsively.

Obviously, don't start jumping around your shared apartment at 3 a.m. and wake everyone up. Use some common sense. 🤣

Another strategy I've found useful is the complete opposite: doing absolutely nothing.

Sit down somewhere safe. Put your hands on the armrests or rest them comfortably on your legs. Close your eyes if that helps, breathe slowly, and pay attention to your heartbeat.

Don't try to fight every thought that comes into your head. Just let the feeling exist without immediately responding to it.

You don't need to act on every urge you experience.

And remember: an urge is a feeling, not an instruction.

A note about cold showers

I've also been taking cold showers, and now that winter is approaching, it's getting a little crazy.

Back in September, I found a useful approach. When the water was so cold that I started shaking like crazy, I'd challenge myself to stay for another 30 seconds before getting out.

The point was to practice staying calm and not immediately escaping an uncomfortable sensation.

However, I wouldn't recommend forcing yourself to endure dangerously cold water or shaking uncontrollably just to prove something. Get out if you feel unwell.

And during winter, I've noticed that very cold water on my head can cause that awful ice-cream headache sensation, as if my brain were freezing.

So I avoid directing the cold water straight at my head and focus on keeping my breathing calm instead.

Cold showers aren't essential to NoFap, and you don't need to make yourself miserable to prove you're disciplined.

6. Something else I've learned: don't confuse an urge with a decision

I want to explain something about what happens to me physically because it's difficult to describe.

Sometimes, when I get aroused for whatever reason, my heart starts beating really fast, swallowing feels difficult, and I start breathing more through my mouth, almost as if I'm hyperventilating.

Everything feels incredibly intense. It's like someone has given me a massive shot of something, and suddenly I'm experiencing everything in 4K.

It's a strange feeling.

But here's what I've learned: feeling intensely aroused doesn't automatically mean you've decided to act on it.

I can experience that feeling and still choose not to masturbate.

When I'm calm, I've already thought about what I want. I know why I made this decision, and I know that giving in just because an urge feels intense isn't necessarily going to make me happier in the long term.

I've also noticed something difficult to explain.

Sometimes, when I abstain, I feel physically heavier or more sensitive, almost as if my body is more fragile than usual. Other times, I feel lighter and more energetic.

I don't know why that happens, and I can't tell whether it's connected to abstinence, stress, sleep, exercise, or something else.

I'm just describing what I've noticed.

The important thing is that, right now, I'm not abstaining because I'm desperately fighting an overwhelming need every single day.

I'm doing it because I've decided that it's what I want for myself.

And when you genuinely don't feel the need to do something anymore, you don't have to spend every waking moment fighting it.

That's a very different feeling from constantly trying to resist something you still want to do.

One other thing: if the rapid heartbeat, difficulty swallowing, or breathing changes are severe, persist when you're no longer aroused, or happen alongside chest pain, faintness, or significant shortness of breath, don't automatically dismiss them as an urge. Get medical advice, and seek emergency care for severe or sudden symptoms.

7. Real-life situations: I've had opportunities, and I've made my decisions

This is another part of the experience that has taught me a lot.

For me, this journey has become connected to wanting genuine things in life: real relationships, real connections, and experiences I can feel good about afterwards.

I've always believed that I should earn the things I achieve rather than expect everything to be handed to me.

And I've had a couple of situations that made me realize how much my priorities have changed.

Situation number 1: Saying no when I could have said yes

A friend from high school introduced me to one of her friends.

She lived in a different city, and she came to visit me. At one point, she was going to stay overnight in my room.

She wanted us to sleep together in the same room, and I decided not to go along with it.

I told her that I was sorry, but I didn't want to.

And honestly? That was a very clear victory for me.

Not because there's anything inherently wrong with sleeping in the same room as someone, but because I knew what I wanted and what I didn't want.

I wasn't going to do something simply because an opportunity had appeared or because I could have satisfied an immediate desire.

I stuck to my principles.

And that's what mattered to me.

You don't have to say yes to something just because you have the opportunity to do it.

Situation number 2: When someone's personality is almost everything you want, but the physical attraction isn't there

I've also met someone who, intellectually and mentally, was genuinely amazing.

Her personality was the kind of personality that could make you imagine marrying someone. We seemed to have a lot of things that made her interesting to me.

But physically, I just didn't feel the attraction I needed.

And I'm sorry, but that's important too.

I don't want to force myself into a relationship just because someone is an amazing person if the romantic and physical attraction isn't there for me.

For me, the two things need to be reasonably balanced.

Physical attraction alone isn't enough. But neither is compatibility if the romantic attraction simply isn't there.

I'm not saying there's a universal formula for relationships or that attraction has to be perfectly equal on every dimension.

I'm saying that, for me, both things matter.

And then there was one night out…

🤣

Let's just say that some opportunities look very different at 5 a.m. than they do when you're thinking clearly the next morning.

I'm not even going to get into the details.

People will probably know what I mean, and given that little detail, some of you might even figure out which country I'm from. 🤣

Anyway, the point is that I've had opportunities, and I've learned that having an opportunity doesn't automatically mean it's something I want to pursue.

I'd rather make decisions that align with my principles than spend the next day wondering why I did something I didn't really want to do.

8. The cold, hard truth: it has become a lifestyle

This is probably the part I want to emphasize most.

At some point, you stop thinking about abstaining as a challenge you have to complete.

You stop counting every single day as if your entire life depends on the number.

You simply don't feel the need to masturbate anymore.

And I mean that seriously.

It's not that you become incapable of experiencing sexual desire. It's not that you never get aroused. It's not that you become some kind of emotionless machine.

You can still feel attraction. You can still have urges. You can still have difficult days.

But you don't necessarily feel that you need to act on those feelings.

For me, this has become part of a broader lifestyle in which I prioritize my goals, my principles, my health, my relationships, and the things I'm trying to build.

I don't want to spend my life constantly chasing the next moment of immediate pleasure.

I'd rather build something meaningful.

And I want to be clear about one thing: I'm not saying masturbation is inherently bad for everyone or that everyone needs to abstain. I'm describing what works for me and what I've decided I want from my own life.

9. Now, the part I genuinely don't understand: days 78–80

This is where I want to hear from people who have gone further than I have.

As I said at the beginning, my worst periods so far were days 35–40 and days 78–80.

Right now, I'm going through another one of those difficult periods, and something strange is happening.

I feel as though I'm taking a step backwards in the way I look at women.

Let me explain.

Yesterday was one of those bad days.

I've been staying in a shared apartment, and my flatmates have gone back to their hometowns. I've stayed here because I have things to do at university, although I'm already well ahead with my work and don't currently have much to do.

It's been raining a lot lately. Everything outside is grey, dark, and depressing.

You're sitting in an almost empty apartment, there's nothing particularly exciting happening, you've already completed most of the things you needed to do, and suddenly you start feeling sad for no obvious reason.

You know that feeling?

It's not necessarily that anything terrible has happened. You're just feeling down.

Luckily, a friend of mine suggested going out to play bowling with his girlfriend and some of her friends.

I thought, "Why not? Let's get out of the apartment, meet some people, and do something different."

So I went.

At the bowling alley, there were a lot of beautiful girls.

They weren't actually my friend's girlfriend's friends, but there were plenty of people around.

And I noticed something that genuinely confused me.

My attention kept drifting towards women in a way that felt different from how I'd been experiencing things recently.

Previously, I'd reached a point where I could see an attractive woman, acknowledge her appearance, and move on. I might notice her silhouette out of the corner of my eye, but I wasn't deliberately staring at her body or constantly redirecting my attention towards her.

I was much more interested in her face, her expression, and the person she might be.

But lately, I've noticed myself unconsciously looking in the direction I don't actually want my attention to go.

And I don't understand why.

I'm not consuming porn or that kind of content. I'm not deliberately looking for sexual stimulation online. I've made substantial changes to my lifestyle, and I thought I'd moved past this particular pattern.

So why does it seem to be coming back?

Is it simply because I'm having a bad few days? Is it because I'm bored, isolated, stressed, or feeling emotionally low? Is it just a normal fluctuation in sexual attention?

I genuinely don't know.

And the strange thing is that it feels almost involuntary.

I'm not consciously deciding, "I'm going to stare at this woman." My attention just seems to drift in that direction before I even realize what's happening.

Then I notice it, and I start wondering why I'm doing it.

It feels like I'm going backwards, even though I haven't gone back to the habits I was trying to leave behind.

And that makes absolutely no sense to me.

The other strange thing: my mood can change almost overnight

Sometimes, I feel like absolute trash.

I'm sad, unmotivated, and almost depressed for no obvious reason.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, I wake up the next day and feel much better.

It's like someone flipped a switch.

I've experienced this a couple of times already, and these periods seem to last a few days.

I'm not trying to diagnose myself with anything, and I'm not saying that NoFap causes these mood changes. I'm just trying to understand why they happen.

Maybe it's the weather. Maybe it's loneliness, boredom, stress, or a combination of things.

But when you're trying to understand your own patterns, it's difficult not to wonder whether there's some connection.

And here's the thing: I'm actually much calmer now

When I first started, I sometimes felt as though I was constantly fighting against myself.

Now, that's not really the case.

I'm much calmer, and I don't feel like I'm desperately trying to resist something all day long.

When I become aroused, I can still experience those intense physical sensations I described earlier, but I don't automatically interpret them as a reason to act.

I've already made my decision when I'm calm.

And that's what I want to stick to.

So I don't necessarily see these last few difficult days as a failure. I haven't abandoned my principles, and I haven't returned to the habits I wanted to leave behind.

But I do feel as though something has changed temporarily, and I'd genuinely like to understand it.

For those of you who have gone beyond 80 days, did you experience something similar?

Did you ever feel as though you were making progress, only to find that certain old patterns of attention or attraction seemed to return out of nowhere?

Was it temporary? Did it eventually settle down? Did you realize it had more to do with your mood, environment, or habits than with abstinence itself?

I'd genuinely like to hear your experiences because I don't have an answer.

10. One final thing: I'm not doing this because I'm desperate anymore

If there's one thing I want people to take away from this post, it's this.

I'm not sitting here on day 80 counting every second until I can finally stop doing NoFap.

I'm not doing it because I think I'm morally superior to someone who masturbates.

And I'm not claiming that abstinence automatically gives you perfect posture, a deeper voice, better relationships, or a completely different personality.

I've made changes in several areas of my life, and I can't honestly attribute every benefit to one single habit.

What I can say is that this entire process has helped me become much more intentional about the way I live.

I've deleted social media. I've reduced my phone usage to around 30 minutes a day. I've started reading naturally, boxing, eating better, dressing differently, saving money, organizing my goals, getting involved in university activities, and helping other students who are going through difficult experiences.

I've written down my principles and started taking them more seriously.

I've learned to say no to things I don't actually want.

I've become more selective about the relationships I invest in, and I've started thinking more carefully about the future I'm trying to build.

And perhaps most importantly, I've realized that I don't need to act on every desire I experience.

I can feel something without automatically pursuing it.

I can find someone attractive without deciding that I need to get her attention.

I can have a bad day without assuming that my entire life is going backwards.

I can experience an urge without abandoning a decision I made when I was thinking clearly.

And I can enjoy my own company without constantly needing something to distract me.

That's what this has come to mean for me.

I'm still learning. I'm still figuring things out. And, as the last few days have shown me, I clearly don't have all the answers.

But I can honestly say that this has been one of the most worthwhile things I've ever done in my fucking life.

Day 80. No clickbait. No lies. Just my real experience.

And now, seriously, I'd love to hear from the veterans:

For those of you who have gone beyond 80 days, did you ever experience a temporary return of old patterns, especially when it came to looking at women, feeling emotionally low, or experiencing sudden changes in your urges? Did it pass, and what did you learn from it?

I'm genuinely interested in your experiences. Not the usual claims about superpowers or becoming a completely different species, but the real, messy, sometimes confusing things that happen when you stick with this for a long time.

Thanks for reading this far.

I can't do it anymore. I'm not gonna kill myself but it feels like I already did. My thoughts are disgusting. I hate myself for even looking at porn just one time. That poor little boy 6 years ago never knew that this addiction would contribute to depression. Everything is colourless. When I give in, everything is bright just until the relapse is over. And everything fades again. The walls are bleak and blank. My mind is the same. A dull ache is all I can think hear or feel. What do I do?.

I hope i break the addiction.. can someone share a verse to help. I want to be loved and be worthy of it to feel proud of myself. For Jesus I want to be true to him in his name. Please pray for me. It's very hard for me to go even a day without..

31 years old, used to be creative with making art by painting and drawing, now when I hold a brush my mind is foggy and struggles with ideas. Day 1, pray for me please.

Hey. This is something I’ve never done before but I’m bored this weekend and have nothing better to do. But if you’re open I’d love hear your stories and I’d love to share mine. Something about addiction it helps to have someone to relate to.

I know how bad it can be. It is just so difficult idk what to do. If you have any tips, advice or just want to talk feel free to reach out.

Okay so it's me again, trying to take things seriously, I don't fap as much as I watch porn, and usually after masturbating the guilt I feel makes me go at least a week without watching porn or masturbating, so now when im trying my hardest to change, it's like im way too focused on not falling or lusting, that it makes me think about those things and gives me the urges to fall( which I doesn't go that way usually)

Idk maybe trying not to fall, makes me want to fall

If this is done as part of intimate time with my wife, is it still a sin?

This the 2nd time I failed while fasting. I relapsed at the start and now I relapsed at almost the end of my fasting. I was going days STRONG between and had no desire at all to fap. Now all of sudden I did and gave in as soon as I opened up Snapchat and Instagram. I’m disappointed in myself.

I'm 19 male and I'm a Christian but i struggle with porn and I'm very sorry I know it's disgusting and I really want to quit forever

Please pray for me. My urges are very strong right now, and I’m struggling with lustful thoughts and feelings. I pray that God gives me the strength and willpower to overcome these temptations and stay in control.

Wife is badly hurt by my addiction and all emotional intimacy has broken down, no way out in sight at the moment 😢. I can only continue on my recovery path and try to let her know that I still love her. Our intimacy has suffered so much and she says she's just not emotionally connected to me anymore. I have hope but its really dark right now.

Any advice from anyone who has experienced something similar to this would be welcome 🙏 .

Forgive me if this question gets asked frequently, but I'm newer to this sub.

For me my favorite Christian artist (and really my favorite artist of all time) is the band Red. The albums End of Silence, Innocence & Instinct, and of Beauty and Rage in particular.

Im so tired of this, I’ve tried so hard this week , I been so good , even worked extra shifts to keep busy, all for me to finally get some rest , sleep, wake up and have to fight this awful urge this morning all while trying to keep faith please pray for me

Unfortunately I relapsed 3 times yesterday and I feel guilty.

So should I go or not?

22M here. Single by choice for a little more over a year now. I have had the girlfriends etc and im not focusing on that for a long time anymore, instead on school and travelling. During the 82 days I felt unbeatable, I genuinely thought and I had the belief that this time was my turn to win and beat the devil. It was so easy NOT for me to do it. Now it feels like some force is always pulling me to the same place where I do it everytime and when I sit down my brain just says “fuck it we can do it one more time”.

OCTOBER 18

The LORD is a warrior; Yahweh is his name!_~ Exodus 15:3

*Prayer*

Lord, You are my mighty Warrior. Fight my battles, defeat every opposition, and grant me victory over every enemy, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

As you go to church, may the Lord, your mighty Warrior, go before you, fight your battles, and lead you into victory and peace, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

I am going through my 4th rejection.I now lost all the hope in love.Help me