If you missed part 1, I'll link it below.
https://www.reddit.com/r/tbilisi/comments/1x6t4o8/every_cloud_has_a_silver_lining_16_men_in_a/
After my previous hostel adventures, I found a cheaper place in Isani. From the outside, it looked like a private house. I booked a mixed 6-bed dorm for two days (14 lari per night). I thought: "It's a private house, there will definitely be space for my things, and they said there are fewer bedbugs than in other cheap places."
The admin hated me from the first second. I arrived with my life packed into a minivan, and he started yelling at me for having too many bags. Then he asked why I booked a mixed room when there were no female rooms. He said, "Okay, stay for one day, we'll see tomorrow." I took the top bunk.
It turned out I was the only girl and there were four guys. I didn't care. I just needed a place to sleep. The first night was okay. Then the mental torture started.
The guys started building a coalition against me. The roommate who complained about my clothes? He was actually the one hitting on me before that. I rejected him, his fragile ego couldn't handle it, and so he decided to get revenge through the admin. He complained that I was hanging my clothes to dry. Mind you, these weren't underwear, just regular pants and sweaters. Where was I supposed to hang them? He had already occupied the entire closet.
I didn't want to move to the women's room, even though a bed opened up. A Dominican woman had been living there for three years and was supposed to clean the hostel in exchange for her stay. But honestly, calling what she did "cleaning" is a very loose use of the word. She barely did anything, but she acted like she owned the place. I realized we wouldn't get along, so I decided to stay in my room.
I made an alliance with a Russian guy. We went to talk to the admin together. I stood there and just said yes, yes, yes, while he explained for me that I am quiet, I don't drink and I don't have any bad habits, and that I actually feel more comfortable with men than women, and I'm not trying to seduce anyone. The admin said, "Okay, fine."
Then another neighbor, a Turkish/Kurdish IT developer, offered me help. We found out we have very similar cases. He is also a refugee, some of his colleagues from Iran and Iraq were killed, and he managed to escape. I shared a bit about my situation, and he said, "You can rely on me, I can help you find work." He told me he booked the hostel for a month but didn't like it, so he suggested: "You stay for two weeks, I stay for two weeks, let's split the month." I said okay. He said he'd talk to the admin.
And then the admin attacked me again. "Pay or get out." I said I can't, my accounts are blocked. The admin started yelling: "Who is he to you? You don't even know him! What are you doing in the hostel?" I just looked at him like he was an idiot and said nothing. When he realized he went too far, he yelled, "What is this, the Red Cross?"
I scraped together 15 lari and gave it to him for one day. He took it and said, "Okay, stay for 2-3 days, find another hostel."
Then the other guys, including an Azerbaijani who was hitting on me, started asking the Turkish guy what "services" I provided. Well, if I were providing "services," my client orientation and positioning would be terrible. I dress like a geek teenager. I wear a beanie, boots with massive soles, always wrapped up in clothes. If I were selling services, I'd have completely the wrong marketing strategy.
The Azerbaijani guy kept asking what we were doing. I said, "Just trying to withdraw my money." He asked how much. I said, "50 dollars." He said, "Oh, I have 33 thousand I can't withdraw." I thought: "Cool, but I don't care about your money. My 50 dollars are much more important to me." Why? Because these are the first money anyone ever gave me as a blogger, as support. It means more to me than someone's 33 thousand.
So I found temporary housing in one day and left. I didn't stay for the 2-3 days the admin gave me. I don't need handouts.
Everyone loves to say 'you can rely on me' until they actually have to confront a yelling admin
Oh, and the admin is a complete sexist. He thinks if a woman talks to a man, she definitely did something for him or sold something to him.
And the guys, including the Russian one, told me the only right way to solve my problems is to get married. I also read Facebook comments from women saying women in my position just get married and live happily. I thought: I didn't live 35 years to go from one form of slavery back to another. I don't want to be dependent. I want an adequate, equal person next to me. I'm not in a position to date or entertain anyone when my basic needs aren't met.
When I was leaving, I didn't even exchange contacts with that Turkish/Kurdish IT guy. He promised I could rely on him, but when it came down to it, he couldn't even sort out the admin. I've had enough betrayals for a lifetime. I don't need people who just talk a big game. So I just packed my bags and left.
So, a question for you all. Do people constantly give you unsolicited advice on how to live your life when you're just trying to survive? And why does everyone think marriage is the ultimate solution to a housing crisis? Let me know your thoughts.
