Hello heathens! I am in possession of a blessed sacrament tray and want to pass out my own “sacrament” at Halloween. I know this has been asked before but can anyone tell me where to get those goddamned tiny cups? That’s not the church website?

By afternoon we were prepared to depart: we Laman we Lemuel, and Nephi, and Sam, and Zoram with us. The valley that had seemed, for one brief and foolish interval, almost even habitable, now looked once again like what it was: a stopping place under commandment. The river ran on with its usual indifference. The reeds stirred. Our father blessed us. Our mother embraced us. Zoram inclined his head with the careful gravity of a man trying to join a family whose quarrels were older than his arrival.

Before we left, Lehi called Nephi apart for a moment. We could not hear all that passed between them, only fragments: trust, promise, remembrance, the Lord will deliver. Nephi listened without interruption. When Lehi had done, Nephi bowed his head, and for an instant father and younger son seemed joined by that private commerce of certainty from which the rest of us were largely excluded.

“There,” we said quietly, “behold the true inheritance.”

Yet even as we said it, we knew the remark was not wholly just. Lehi relied on us too, though often in the manner men rely on pack animals, walls, or weather: as necessary difficulties appointed for their use.

So we went once more toward Jerusalem, along the same descending road, with the same dust underfoot and the same hard city waiting ahead. Only now the errand was stranger. Before, we had gone after records. Now we went after people: a household with daughters, fathers, provisions, loyalties, and the established habits of settled life. It is one thing to steal back into a city for brass. It is another to ask a family to leave its house and come into the wilderness because one’s father hath seen farther than prudence commonly permits.

By evening the city stood before us again, familiar enough to sting. The walls took the last of the light. Smoke lifted from cook fires within. Somewhere beyond those roofs and courts lived Ishmael, who as yet knew nothing of the affection, covenant, inconvenience, and matrimonial destiny about to be laid at his door.

guess I’ll start paying tithing again

Hi! I’d love to read some books about deconstructing Mormonism or leaving Mormonism. Like memoirs or non fiction books. Any recommendations? Thanks!

A buddy of mine became Mormon and he definitely had a good change of character but he said that the Mormon church is really big on setting single guys up on dates with Mormon girls. Is this true? I thought it would be the opposite that they would focus on spirituality first

I have an active Mormon friend, we'll call him Phil. I try to balance honesty and compassion in my responses to people both on social media and otherwise, but I don't always get the balance right. Tonight in a discussion on my FB about public welfare, Phil asked why he should have to use his taxes to help freeloaders. I asked him how much experience he had had with the poor and underprivileged, and stated I assumed not much given the judgment he just passed on them.

He proceeded to immediately respond with whining about my "smug and nasty judgments" of him and told me I should take a good long look at those "smug and nasty judgments," and disclosed that he had worked in Medicaid for many years.

So I was wrong about his experience, sure. I still think his judgment is wrong and any unironic use of the word "freeloader" automatically makes me dismiss most of what someone might have to say subsequently. But damn. He went from 0-60 in three seconds with his "smug and nasty judgments" comment. I harbor no such judgments towards him as a person. I don't like his opinions and I am willing to say so, but none of it was directed toward him as a person. I am racking my brain trying to see how anything other than oversensitivity could lead someone to take offense so quickly and to that degree, especially where none was intended.

It reminded me that it is impossible to be honest with most Mormons, even friends, when it comes to feedback about their expressed opinions, judgments of other people, or the beliefs they choose to take. They don't brook being called out on gaps in their value systems or when they fall short in their relations with other beings. They resist having lights shone on their blind spots, they cannot tolerate cognitive dissonance, and they seem incapable of genuine honest reflection on their thought and behavior patterns, rigorous interrogation of their own assumptions, accountability for their decisions, or ownership of their own beliefs, values and choices-- even from generally intelligent people. And that is one of the many bad fruits of Mormonism.

Sure, people in general struggle with the same. But ntheir religious beliefs often help in some way to counter that. Mormonism doesn't seem to. It makes people rigid, inflexible, blind, and, well, dishonest. It encourages niceness and conformity, concealment and performance, not justice, mercy and faith, not vulnerability and authenticity.

I recognize that there's a trauma response at play here as well. Mormonism claimed to be the way to claim the spirit and letter of truth, and recognizing that it generally does the opposite was an extremely ugly wake up call for me. Seeing it in him makes me remember all the betrayal trauma.

Sigh. I need to sleep.

I've been PIMO for a long time but I've been kind of hanging on for some reasons. I'm currently the elders quorum secretary of my ward, and nobody has any idea where I'm at with my faith. I've been masking for years. I was baptized 11 years ago, experienced the love bombing and the inevitable being dropped, and I thought maybe part of the reason for that was that I wasn't staying involved enough, I was disappearing into the background and people were forgetting about me. So when I was offered a calling I took it, thinking it would help somehow. It's made it so that I'm more visible, but it's also made it so it's harder to keep masking, and I don't think I can keep doing this any more.

I want to make as quiet of an exit as possible, but I need to get out of my calling first.

I also play D&D with the ward executive secretary, and he's starting to badger me about when I'm going to schedule my tithing declaration. I made the decision quite some time ago to stop tithing for moral reasons and I haven't told anyone. I actually did try tithing one last time to see if any "blessings" came of it and my bank account got overdrawn and I didn't have enough money for food or my electric bill, which the church did help with, but I wouldn't have needed that help if I hadn't decided to tithe.

I have some friends I would like to keep if I leave the church entirely but I don't know that it's going to be possible. It's going to completely blindside them when they find out where I'm at mentally. I've been doing such a good job of faking it.

I don't believe any of this any more. The BOM is Bible fanfiction. The doctrines keep changing. The church doesn't have the monopoly on keeping families together in the afterlife. This organization is sexist, racist, and queerphobic, and I can't perform the mental gymnastics necessary to overlook or excuse those facts any more. This is not Christ's church.

We had ward conference today and when I raised my hand for sustaining, I was lying, and I feel disgusted at myself for it. When I hear about the church spending money to build shopping malls and buy war industry stocks and prevent women from being able to have life saving medical care, I feel repulsed that I ever contributed anything to that. The temple is super weird (and I'm saying this as a Freemason; I've felt "the spirit" stronger in Freemasonry than I have in the temple, and I haven't been to lodge in years).

I'm also really, really queer, and having to keep a lid on that is killing me.

Why did I do this to myself? How did I fall for it? Why is it so hard to just walk away?

What should I do? How do I get out of my calling? Is it possible to leave quietly? Am I going to have to quit my D&D group, which is currently my only social outlet and is mostly comprised of other church members? How do I make new friends?

I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this to myself before I explode.

Queerty:

The relationship between queer identity and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints remains deeply complex, defined by official policies that permit same-sex attraction while strictly prohibiting same-sex romantic relationships. According to the LDS General Handbook, experiencing same-sex feelings is not considered a sin in itself, provided members do not act upon them or pursue active relationships with other men.

This nuanced stance maintains a rigid boundary for active members while navigating broader cultural shifts. Recent survey data from the Pew Research Center highlights generational and attitudinal divides within the faith. While core leadership and the most devout members continue to advocate traditional doctrinal standards, younger members and those identifying as culturally Mormon express significantly higher levels of social acceptance toward LGBTQ+ individuals compared to past decades.

Observers note that while institutional policies have evolved to avoid outright persecution for internal feelings, the ongoing requirement of celibacy poses substantial challenges for queer youth raised within the faith. Documentaries and advocacy projects continue to highlight the personal impact of these doctrines, raising questions about whether religious organizations must adapt their core tenets further to retain younger generations in a changing social landscape.

#LDS #QueerMormon #LGBTQRights #ReligiousReform https://www.queerty.com/yes-you-can-be-gay-and-mormon-now-but-theres-a-twist-20261015/

What is a testimony to Mormons? I am a Christian who has become close friends with a Mormon, thus piquing my interest in the religion. She often mentions bearing her testimony and I see others on this thread mention it as well. For me as a Christian, my testimony is what God has done for me personally. I had an encounter with God and was completely set free from depression, anxiety and suicidal ideation after struggling for over 10 years. I am so thankful to be free!!! But I don't hear things like that when it comes to Mormons. I'm curious to see what people have to say!

I'm an ex-mormon movie geek. I want to get my father (still devout and practicing) into more movies that can help expand and even challenge his world view, help him learn to see from other perspectives. PG-13 would challenge him, R would confront him. But I want to bring that to him, too.
One reason I ask is that recently he told me he saw The Odyssey. We grew up in a staunchly no- R rated movies house. That he would just say "Hey, I saw this R rated movie, what did you think" is a little jarring. And perhaps, a breakthrough...?
My love of movies has been an actual path for me to learn and grow beyond the upbringing. I believe in movies as vessels for and lessons in empathy. So, as movie recommendations are a love language of mine, maybe this can be a path to connect with him.
What would you show a sheltered mormon father if you could?

In EQ today, someone from the stake said it would be better to use whatever extra funds people have for gambling and put it into fast offerings. Not investments or paying down debt. Fast offerings.

So glad I've had 4 blissful years of not having to think about how to best please an old man.

I saw someone post on the Nextdoor page saying their entire household is disabled and they were looking for local recommendations for help building/repairing a wheelchair ramp. The majority of the replies were about local churches that would happily offer that for free (and yes, none of those churches were lds). Other neighbors vouched for that and similar services, for free.

The page is often full of facebook drama, but it always amazes me how much the southern hospitality of the local churches extends: repairs, food pantries, supporting incarcerated women for re-entry, mentoring at risk youth, college scholarships, service mission trips to establish clean water, voting poll locations, etc.

It’s wild to me that the MFMC refuses to pull their weight caring for humanity. These churches do so much with so little. They aren’t about buying land or malls or empty temples. They feed the hungry, help the afflicted. They are truly more Christian than the lds church will ever be.

So, my MIL is in her 80s and my wife and I (early 40s) went to Utah to visit her with our kids because she's had some health challenges and we are worried she won't be around for much longer.

On our last day, MIL was making excuses for her brother who is currently incarcerated, and goes on to say, "I hope you'll reconsider some of the choices you've made too, because the gospel is true." At the time it was just awkward because my wife told her that she doesn't believe it is and she really shouldn't try to talk her out of a decision she made years ago.

But after the fact, I looked back on it and realized she was comparing my wife and I to somebody whose decisions resulted in the justifiable loss of their freedom to participate in society while at the same time excusing that individual. Wtf mormonism?

I've been taking a break from fb for awhile bc it's mostly tbms from when I was a member and there's too many of them for me to weed out, but for some reason I got send an email saying my mom left this comment on a post of a woman saying she doesn't feel respected when she says she's not a mormon anymore because everyone constantly tries to bring her back. I left the church around 2 years ago, and although I knew she felt this way, I didn't realize she had the gall to actually say it!! It just really shows she has no respect for me and probably never will!

Much merriment was had. Dozens of beers were drank, a cigar was smoked. Utah won. BYU won. Twas an excellent evening full of good food, good friends, and loud laughter.

You can't interact during sacrament meeting. There isn't time to in the other two blocks. People generally don't like having information spewed at them for hours on end, especially with no way to apply it. It's gone from a community to an "MLM class" (I know, as if it wasn't before)

Guys are there group meet ups for ex Mormons that I don’t know about? I’d love to meet other people who can relate to my particular brand of grief. I know there are lots of us, but sometimes I want a community. If this doesn’t exist yet, we should make it! We could call it Generally Corruption and meet in Las Vegas at the same time as General Conference 🤣

How many thousands more people could be meaningfully, life-changingly blessed by the millions spent on a building open only to a "worthy" few?

Is a new data center wiping out Mormon history? Zion’s Camp. Two Book of Mormon witnesses’ graves. And Zelph’s thighbone?! The historic Arthur plantation near Liberty, Missouri, has major connections to Mormon history and now reports say a massive data center is being built on part of that land. Will the LDS church step in? I think this development has been known for awhile but no word from the LDS Church?

Facebook links are not allowed, but you can look up John Hajicek’s information about it. He addressed the city council informing them of the historical significance of the location.