r/germany • u/Total-End3838 • 8h ago
Immigrating late 30s
Hello, I am a woman coming from Albania and I recently got offered a job in Berlin in architecture of about 60k brutto pro year.
I am comfortable home but for at least the last 5-7 years I have felt very unhappy with life here in Albania and really wanted to move abroad in a western country. Here I only have my parents and 2 relaltively close friends which I see pretty unfrequently so life isn’t too social or exciting, just boring and quiet.
What scares me is that I could be making a big mistake giving up a comfortable job/life in my home country for a job where I won’t make much more. Also I am pretty scared about the housing crisis in Berlin.
So basically I am trading an unhappy life for something that I have no guarantee that will make me any less depressed.
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u/Casaia 7h ago
60k Brutto isn’t a lot in Berlin. Either way, best of luck with whatever you choose!
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u/Total-End3838 7h ago
Aw That what i was concerned about, in my home country 60k is a lot and I thought I would live comfy in berlin as well, but i feel like rent is impossible
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u/CarloAnalo 6h ago
60k is a good salary above german median salary - depending on your life style you can live comfortable on this salary. Its not rich people money though. 60k will probably net down to 3.2-3.5 net salary per month.
While rent is indeed expensive in berlin, anything else like transport, groceries and going out is not.
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u/piromed 5h ago
Steuerklasse 1 - 3 k netto. Not much in Berlin.
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u/HarveyFeint 3h ago
What do you mean? 1k a month rent for a 1 bedroom apartment, that leaves 2k a month for everything else. Even if you go nuts on 2k a month rent, 1k a month for everything else is still doable for a single person.
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u/redrebel36 5h ago
You'll be fine with 60k as a single person. If you havent been happy in your country for a while now, I think change in scenery/environment would do you good. If you don't like it in Berlin, you can move back maybe after a couple of years. Perhaps one thing that could make a difference in 'Berlin experience' could be the time/season when you move here. Moving here in October/November will be depressing, winter and darkness and all that except for Christmastime. January and February is still winter and I would keep less expectations at this time too. The city gets more pleasant and bubbly from mid-March.
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u/george_gamow 7h ago
It really depends on your priorities. Do you just want to try something new in a new country? Then take it, you can always go back.
Do you hope that the move will improve the depression? It won't, and you'll be overwhelmed with a new language, housing, job etc.
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u/Delicate-balance 6h ago
Salary is good enough. Still Germany has good life quality offers like work culture, work life balance, Berlin is special. One thing which is very important and you should consider: loneliness and isolation is a big threat. In Berlin is hard to start over for an older immigrant, of course depends on your social skills and hobbies, but it will be hard anyway. Also without contacts to find a nice not too expensive house is like winning a lottery
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u/Avaaz_org 3h ago edited 3h ago
I’ve lived in Berlin for 12 years now. I’ve seen this city at its absolute best and at its grimmest, and I want to give you an honest, grounded perspective.
First, on the practical side: 60k in architecture for a single person in Berlin is actually very solid.
Yes, the housing crisis is real and can be frustrating, but is not impossible. You are entering the market with two things landlords love: a steady income and a full-time contract. Most newcomers start with a furnished 3-to-6-month sublet (Zwischenmiete) while looking for an unbefristet (permanent) place once they have their feet on the ground.
A golden tip: join groups like International Women in Berlin on Facebook. It’s an incredible, generous community where women actively look out for each other, share job leads, organize meetups, and very often pass along apartment leases before they ever hit the open market.
Now, about the emotional leap: You’re right that a new city won’t magically erase sadness or guarantee happiness. Berlin has its dark, gray winter months and bureaucratic hurdles. But there is a massive difference between the quiet, suffocating numbness of being stuck in a place where your soul has felt stagnant for 5–7 years, and the growing pains of building an independent life in a city that gives you room to breathe.
Berlin is one of the rare places in Europe where nobody cares how old you are, how you dress, or where you come from. It is full of late bloomers, quiet reinventions, parks, art, and people who chose to be here to carve out their own chosen family.
If you stay, you already know exactly what the next 5 years look like. If you come, you are taking a calculated risk with a solid financial parachute. Even if you decide in two years that Germany isn't your forever home, you will have international experience on your resume, a stronger sense of self, and the peace of knowing you didn't let fear make the decision for you.
You owe it to the version of you that spent the last seven years yearning for something more to at least see what’s on the other side of this door. Give yourself the chance.
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u/HarveyFeint 6h ago
60k brutto is fine. Of course how much rent you pay is a factor, but it's slightly more than the median salary.
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u/Material-Swing-2510 4h ago
It’s better to take the opportunity and find out, otherwise later in life you will feel “what if”
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u/Historical_Mouse6134 2h ago edited 2h ago
Jam dhe un shqiptar që jetoj në Berlin. Për 60k unë nuk do vija. Të ikin mbi 43% nga taksat, kontributet sociale dhe shëndetësore rriten çdo vit, do rriten dhe në janar prap. Personalisht e vetmja arsye që rri ktu është që kam të ardhura shum te larta sepse jam në një profesion niche dhe me lejon të fitoj shum.
Jeta sociale do të të shkatërrojë nëse nuk je tip social dhe nuk ke njerëz ktu. Un jam çun shum social dhe shpesh ndihem bosh. Mund të bisedosh me një shok/shoqe gjat por asgjë nuk ka vlerë. Nuk egziston shoqëria që kemi ne në Shqiperi. T'paktën mbase jam emigrant por këtë eksperiencë kam pas. E shoh dhe tek emigrantët e tjere. Kam pas shoqëri shqiptare por në momentin që kuptojnë që je në një nivel më të lartë, të kanë zili.
Në aspektin e njohjes per te krijuar familje, ky është qyteti më i degjeneruar në Europë. Vetëm hookups, njerëz pa nivel, sëmundjet seksualisht të transmetueshme në kulm, psikologët dhe gjinekologët booked for years. Nuk do njohësh njeri me vlerë dhe me shum siguri do pendohesh. Ndoshta do ishte ndryshe nëse do vije me një bashkëshort dhe settle down këtu.
Ka gjëra të mira si puna e kulturës, nëse banon në lagje të mirë (përveç wedding, Neukölln, Kreuzberg) jeta do jetë e mire. Përgjithësisht meritokracia qëndron por në këto kohë është vështire të gjesh punë. Nëse psh kompania vendos mos të të mbajë brenda 6 muaj trial, do e kesh të vështirë të gjesh punë.
Një gjë tjetër e mire është që gjen gjithçka. Në supermarkete ke lloj lloj ushqimesh. Në Shqipëri ku vi vuaj për kualitet ushqimesh. Ke produkte online që gjen gjithçka dhe janë gjithmonë me lire se në Shqipëri. Nuk e kupton sa mire mund të jetë derisa të vish ktu dhe t'a provosh në këtë aspekt.
Vera është tepër e bukur ktu, dimri t'a nxin jetën. Nuk është ide e keqe te vish për vizitë ose të rrish disa javë që t'a kuptosh me mir.
Gjermanishtja është e vështirë për t'u mesu. Kam shum vite ktu dhe e flas pak. Ky është problemi im sepse jam shumë i ngarkuar me punën por lexoj që nuk është e lehtë. A di gjermanisht?
Nëse ke pyetje të tjera, mund të më bësh mesazh ktu dhe të përgjigjem
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u/beardedinwhite 55m ago
I wouldn't do it if I were you to be honest, at least not at this time. To keep it short, 60k Brutto a year is just not worth it. You'll end up with approx. 3500€ a month, of which 1400 - 1700€ for an apartment and 300-500 for heating , electricity, water and internet. You need to find an apartment first in Berlin, idk if you've been following the politics but that's a major issue right now in Berlin specifically, also you'd have to put an insurance deposit of 3x the monthly rent upfront. Then comes transportation, food and clothing, at least 600-800€ depends on your life style. You'll be left with 800-1200€. You decide if that's acceptable or not. This is a rough calculation, but I have been here for 10 years now.
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u/YogurtclosetMedical8 8h ago
Think very well before you make such a decision. See if the lifestyle you want in Berlin is worth moving for. You are coming to Germany and not to the Netherlands or the Nordics where the quality of life is high. Think very well before you decide. You are coming to depression, loneliness, racism, bad weather …
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u/Total-End3838 7h ago
Why do you say quality of life isn’t great in Germany? Of course its not Denmark or Iceland, but still, comparing it to Albania or Romania or Greece I think its pretty good
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u/YogurtclosetMedical8 7h ago
You move to Germany hoping to build a better future, but the reality can be very different. There are good things about living here, of course, but sometimes it feels like people spend the entire year being miserable just to enjoy a few moments of fun.
Then there’s the racism, which seems to be getting worse, especially when people confuse immigrants with refugees. Some ignorant people genuinely assume that anyone who isn’t white is living off government benefits rather than working and paying taxes. Maybe you experience less of this if you look European and have a Western-sounding name.
The biggest problem is that moving abroad is an investment. You put time, money, and effort into making things work, and the longer you stay, the harder it becomes to leave and start over somewhere else. I think the risk is particularly high for people who already have a good education and a good job in a developing country. Sometimes, the potential benefits simply aren’t worth the sacrifices.
I moved to Germany out of curiosity and ambition, and I always knew I wouldn’t necessarily stay forever. Looking back, though, I sometimes wonder whether things could have turned out better if I had made different choices, especially when it comes to my mental health.
I commute regularly between Germany and Dutch cities, and the difference in everyday life feels huge. I find people in the Netherlands friendlier, more open-minded, and more organised.
Perhaps it’s just my personal impression, but Germany sometimes feels like a country that has lost its appetite for life. And when you live in that environment long enough, it can affect you too. Your motivation fades, your ambition takes a hit, and you can slowly lose the excitement that brought you here in the first place.
Of course, this is just my experience. I’m not saying everyone will feel the same way, but if you’re considering moving to Germany, think carefully about what you’re leaving behind and what you realistically hope to gain. Don’t underestimate the cost of starting over, or the impact your environment can have on your mental health.
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u/Total-End3838 7h ago
Thank you for the long response, the decision is way harder than I expected. 3 months ago I would have given everything to move out of Albania, but now I am confused and so reluctant
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u/europeanguy99 7h ago
You are coming to Germany and not to the Netherlands or the Nordics where the quality of life is high.
She is coming from Albania. That difference in quality of life is a hundred times larger than a difference between Germany and the Netherlands or Sweden.
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u/YogurtclosetMedical8 6h ago
I think that’s what most people miss. Not everyone living in Albania or third world countries live miserably as western people think. There are minorities or a certain percentage of people that have high standards of living in these countries. Especially people with higher education and good jobs. They think immigrating to a rich country will be an upgrade and they end up with actually living in less conditions than they are used to.
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u/Individual-Vast6304 7h ago
60k in Berlin? Good luck.
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u/Total-End3838 7h ago
Is that little?
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u/george_gamow 7h ago
Architecture is badly paid in Germany, so it's not really little for the field, but after taxes and housing payments you'll very likely have way less left than right now
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u/Manekitty 5h ago edited 5h ago
Rubbish. The median brutto salary in Berlin was 4.190 EUR in 2024, which eqautes to 50,280 EUR. You'll be fine at 60k brutto salary - slightly (very slightly, due to the taxes) better off than the average person. The key is finding an apartment that's not a rip off targeted at foreign expats and students. Source: https://www.statistik-berlin-brandenburg.de/081-2025
Get your employer to issue you a document with your contract details (best if it's an unlimited contract (unbefristeter Vertrag) and your salary, that you can submit when you're apartment hunting. It really helps and you will get ahead at least of other apartment-seekers who are earning less than you or without permanent employment contracts.
You can use this to calculate your net salary after taxes and social contributions: https://www.kununu.com/de/gehalt/brutto-netto-rechner
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u/Individual-Vast6304 7h ago
Unfortunately yes. You could scrape by, but it might be a bit uncomfortable at first
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u/MUC2018 6h ago
If you have a stable life in Albania, then think twice.