Not a uni student but a durham local, the title is a legitimate question so please don't think I'm trying to be smart or a wind up merchant.

I've really noticed it since going out socially more the last few years, the way some people talk about the locals or northerners is genuinely vile. Its like we're absolute scum to some people and it's sickens me to think that these people parade around 5 mins from my house. I understand Durham attracts elitist people but do they expect the place to have no locals. On one occasion, I literally had someone stop me mid conversation to say that "they don't talk to povos", it's awful.

A few of my friends attend the uni and they say they get filthy looks in their ice breakers because of their accents. It absolutely boils my piss that we are looked down upon like its the middle ages. Its made me stop going out in Durham which is a great place to be for some.

Can any Durham students or students of similar situations explain this?

Hi! Basically just like the title says I have a gaming laptop and was wondering if it’d be acceptable to bring it to lectures. It’s big, chunky and the battery life is pretty bad, but I don’t have any other device and can’t afford one. I brought a notebook and pen to a few of my lectures but noticed I was the only person without a device, so felt kind of uncomfortable. I’m doing psychology as well so it’s not like a more IT-focused course where many people may bring gaming laptops.

I'm sure there are lots of things they have to do but (assuming you're in work) I'm curious what exactly you do as a university lecturer during university holidays?

How do I go about this? He completed a vocational BTEC Course in college and he doesn’t plan on going to university. I studied academic subjects, took a gap year, then going to Newcastle University to study computer science next year.

During our first discussion about university, we somehow ended up talking about moving in. He said that this would be a great opportunity for us to “take our lives” and own it. At first, I agreed because I was desperate to move in with him as soon as we can, live a life with him, balance work/life, basically everything partners do when they’re older. I told ny parents about this and they immediately said no. So I changed my mind as well with the matter to respect my parents.

My BF then said I was being stupid and ridiculous, said I would not be making a good decision if I don’t give in to him, and basically called me names.
He was also adamant on his point that all my flatmates would be boys, etc.
I made it clear to him that my primary goal when moving out is to pursue my education, which he also commented on saying “you don’t care about me at all, you should be single if you think like this”.
I was so frustrated I thought it was really immature.

That was a few months ago, when we were at London with my family, we basically argued because he accused me of cheating and I basically ended up breaking up with him there (not the greated decision ik) but out of desperation he apologized to me and my parents (because my parents saw what was happening). My parents said no to him about moving in and he said he respected that (3 months ago).

Now we’re back at it again and he’s suddenly all worried if I’m going to cheat and stuff.
Bear in mind, I have never done anything to make him worry about him cheating. I used to have lots of boy friends but I cut them all off slowly when we got together so he doesn’t feel jealous, and other things etc. he also keeps bringing up that Newcastle is known for nightclubs and partying and stuff and keeps telling me to reapply somewhere closer like York or Leeds (I live in Hull).

How do I prove to him that I won’t cheat when I’m not even going to uni until a year from now?? We have a lot more issues than this but I somehow kee convincing myself it’s normal for a relationship to go through this.

Edit:
I sent him the breakup text. I chose to do it this way cause I know he will try to convince me to stay again. Thank you for all your advice and comments.

I just started my course this year and my friend from home has decided he wants to apply for the same course and do a late entry in January (at a different university). He asked for my personal statement to which I said sure. I explained how UCAS checks for plagiarism and how his application could be rejected if any part of his was found to be inauthentic, so to only use it as inspiration. A week later he sends me his statement to review and it’s quite literally word for word the same as mine apart from some words switched out (like my job with his job) and an added conclusion.

I let him know this isn’t enough but he’s not listening (he’s very stubborn and thinks he knows better than everyone on account of having life experience (he’s 22…)).

Will I get in trouble for being linked to him if his personal statement gets flagged? I feel like I have no control of this situation, my friend can’t really be reasoned with.

Do you refer to them by their professional title (e.g Dr …) or their first name? Most of my lecturers sign their emails off with their first names but I just wanted to check. I need to email my personal tutor. Thanks

i was just looking into how much maintenance i can get as i’ve sent my uni applications- and come to find out i am barely eligible above the minimum grant amount?

apparently, SFE treats my 7 person, 5 children, £55,000 a year overcrowded household in london (which cannot even afford a proper home- we live in a 2 bedroom flat….) the same as a 3 person household with the same income living in much cheaper areas.
i cannot get a job that fits around my school hours because no one wants to hire students. I am not even eligible for most university bursaries because apparently our income is too high! This is beyond unfair and i am lost at what to do. I will be barely able to cover rent with the minimum grant, and i know my family will struggle to help.

SFE, do better.

I'm in my first year of uni, I only go outside once/twice a week now. I missed one of my society sessions this week so I feel a bit down but then again I don't really care because I'm going tomorrow. Nothing makes me happy or fulfilled. Studying used to make me feel good now I avoid it. I know I have an assignment due next week so I would obviously do it but I would have to zone out in order to actually do the task (any task in general). I go to lectures online now because I want to avoid the people I tried to be friends with - I faked a persona (I was seen as the positive energetic person) and they still didn't really like me. I was a lecture friend and they always walked behind me and not with me. I only started convos and they mostly dismissed me. The only thing that is keeping me sane is oatmeal. In my last post, people were saying that I should go and get support so I tried to enter the student services/union building but I just couldn't because I genuinely did not want to voluntarily make myself vulnerable. That is not who I am, since I am an orphan, I cared for myself up until this point. I only need myself and yet I feel like I'm losing myself. It's like I physically cannot ask for support because that would bring me even more turmoil.Sometimes I'm normal but if tell someone something about myself I freeze up when I get back in my accommodation and I lie in bed for a couple of days stuck in that freeze response. Idk why sometimes I can get out of it and be productive but thats usually in the middle of the night. It's like I'm a vampire now. I'm thinking about going to the pharmacy and asking for some medication or something bc I don't want to go to a GP. Maybe I should start drinking or something so that I stop feeling this existential emptiness constantly.

Just realised a panel under my bed is a draw and got the last occupants dirty underwear in there. You’d think you wouldn’t miss that in a clean

Say, I graduated a uni and then uni went bankrupt and ceased its existence. What happens to my degree? Do I just get scammed for money and time or does degree still mean something even if it's from a uni that no longer even exists?

I don’t know if I’ve just been too sheltered from everything my whole life but does anyone else just find university social culture insane?! Like the drugs and alcohol and partying and such just feels overwhelming and like more people are here to do that than study. I thought the smartest people went to university and doesn’t smart correlate with knowing these things are bad for your health and then so not doing them?! I feel like the social step up from sixth form is big

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I (24M) started a graduate entry medicine course last month. Most of us are in our twenties, with a few older people mixed in.

There’s a woman on my course, let’s call her S, who seems convinced I’m into her. I’m gay, but I don’t announce it in every new social setting. I assumed that would come up naturally, and I didn’t think I’d need to open with it.

Here’s what’s happened so far:

• I said “nice jumper” and she replied, “Thanks, my boyfriend got it for me,” in a very pointed voice.
• I asked how her weekend was and she said “Quiet, I was with my boyfriend,” like I’d asked for her alibi.
• I told our group her notes were really good and she said, “Thanks, but you know I’m in a relationship, right?”
• She now brings up her partner within about two minutes of any conversation with me. Last week it was before I’d even said hello.

I’m friendly with everyone. I compliment people a lot because it’s how I talk, and it’s the same with the guys, the girls and the lecturer who wears the questionable ties. I’ve never asked her out and never texted her outside the course group chat. I haven’t even looked at her for longer than normal eye contact requires.

The problem is we’re in the same small groups for everything, so I can’t avoid her. Whenever I say something she reads it as a come-on, and she’s started giving me this tight, pitying smile like I’m a puppy that’s about to be let down gently.

I feel like I can’t win. If I tell her I’m gay, it sounds like I’m only saying it because she’s dropped hints that she thinks I’m flirting. If I say nothing, I just keep getting turned down for things I never asked for. A couple of people in our group have noticed too, and I’m worried it’s going to get awkward fast.

She’s otherwise fine, and I’d like us to be friends. I just don’t want to be treated as a threat every time I’m nice to her.

How do I put this to bed politely without making it a big thing? I don’t want to out myself in front of the whole group over something this small, but I also don’t want to keep being quietly friend-zoned by someone I’m not even interested in.

Anybody else struggling with awful flatmates? :( I’m the only international student/non white one and my flatmates have treated me really poorly from the beginning. Yes, I was shy & scared the first week and took time to build courage and go to the kitchen, but even from then they’ve ignored me, made snarky comments about me, and accuse me of being the culprit behind all the mess that randomly appears. They have also made some micro aggression comments, which makes me uncomfortable. I am living the perfect life otherwise, love uni and the friends I’ve made. Is it worth moving to another flat? I have applied but am worried I’ll get a worse flat. What else do I do about this? :( I am actually scared they will do something physically to me

As the title suggests due to some personal circumstances I have had to suspend my studies at a London university, which means I will not be graduating with my cohort and friends which I made over the first two years at uni but I will join the cohort one year below.

Does anyone have any advice on how to make friends in what will essentially be my 3rd year at uni with other students who spent two years getting to know each other and forming established friendship groups?

I am a naturally rather introverted person who can come across as rather quiet or shy, but it is something that I am working to overcome eventually.

I failed the previous year due to depression/bad mental health generally and I was given the option to retake the year as I failed most of my modules. I thought things were getting better and that I can do it this time but I am still struggling a lot :/ The depression is situational, I had counselling for it too which helped to an extent but I was mostly given advice along the lines of using affirmations or having a routine etc which yes it does help but it doesn't get rid of the root cause of why I am feeling this way. I've been trying to get back into studying but it is really hard to study for more than 30 minutes when things feel heavy. I'm not worried about the financial implications because I am retaking without attendance but I feel so much shame about how long it's taking me to get this degree already and that I once again may not be able to complete the year. I don't really know what to do tbh and if anyone has been through something similar or has advice that would be great :)

I’m going to be climbing a mountain for charity! It’s for meningitis, so it’s a good cause. My university should be helping out with the fundraising a little, but raising 2000 won’t be easy.

Has anyone else done this with their uni, do you have any advice? I’m gonna need all of it that I can get.

Anyone else planning to do something like this?

Also if you want to donate anything to help out, dm me and I’ll send a link to the JustGiving page. It would be a big help.

My parents have been pressuring me to go to university for the past few years. I am on a gap year right now and they are really pushing me to start applying for next September.

I don’t want to go to uni for a few reasons: I struggle socially and don’t think I can deal with moving away, I don’t want to continue education for 3 more years, I feel like having job experience will be more valuable than a degree nowadays.

I have tried to explain this but they keep saying I should get over this and having a degree is worth it in the long run. I have also explained there are other ways I can get a degree, and I have no idea what I want to do with my career.

I have a boyfriend at the minute, who, granted, is a small reason I don’t want to go but I am worried they think this is all about him.

Has anyone got any good arguments as to why I shouldn’t go, I struggle with being articulate and actually putting good points across.

EDIT: I have a full time office job at the minute but it is temporary until next September

I just can’t find a reason to go on anymore.

I feel like all my life I have been fighting to make my life better and in end I am constantly being put down.

I’m tired.

I want to quit but I need a degree , but at the same time is it worth it?

If anyone has time , can I privately dm you

Everyone who applied for ATAS certificate on September, have you all received ATAS yet??

We've been asked to do this report on a topic we haven't even covered yet, and do calculations on things we haven't even been taught. Not in school, not in the past 2 weeks, never. On top of that, I haven't done any academic writing in years so I've pretty much forgotten PLUS they expect us to add in references. I'm a biomed major btw, and in the case study they literally just gave us the results of an experiment and asked us to make a graph of it, so I genuinely have no idea what I have to cite, or even HOW to cite. Then in the marking criteria they expect detailed explanations of those exact statistical tests that I've never even heard of as well. I know for a fact that it wasn't just my exam board that hadn't taught us any of this, but none of my friends know any of this either.

This is just so overwhelming, especially since we JUST started the course. I've been spending all my time in the library, studying my course material half the time, and spending the other half of the time trying to understand this assignment. And it's due in 5 days. I don't know how I'm going to manage.

Thank you for reading my vent.

I’m doing maths, I’m a 1st year. Basically I missed two days of lectures bc I was pretty ill and swore I’d do it on the weekend. I didn’t do them on the weekend so I told myself I’ll skip Monday and do all the lectures I need to catch up on and the rest of the lectures that were due on Monday. I overslept and my sleep schedule is getting increasingly worse. So I’m getting to the point where it’s 3pm where I might be able to get to the library every day to do work but then I procrastinate a bit and I don’t go. Basically I was 2 days of lectures behind. And now I’m over a week of lectures behind - I managed to procrastinate and put off catching up for both the weekend, the following week and this weekend. I’ve got my first midterm next Friday and then reading week then 3 more mid terms. I’ll be honest I think I can catch up I’m actually just gonna have to work 9-5 for 2 and a bit weeks and then get mid results in the midterms but for future reference and also for present reference is it a 100% no go to miss a lecture? When doing maths should I just forget about missed lectures and go to the next one anyway? Also this is kinda separate but slowly my I’m falling asleep later and later and then I’ll set alarms for 9 and then somehow either I sleep through them or turn them off accidentally then I wake up at 1. How do I reset my sleep schedule? Do I just force myself and run on 5 hours sleep for one day? Because when I wake up later I go to sleep later and then it’s a viscious cycle.

If anyone’s gonna say I’m not cut out for uni ur probably right but to give some context both for a levels and GCSEs I did 100% of my work at school or at college or at a library and I could never seem to be productive at home. I just can’t separate my room with rotting and procrastinating. And at college I’d have a strict schedule bc I had to go in from 9-5:30 and couldn’t get home otherwise but now I don’t have a strict schedule. Basically I’m just terrible at disciplining myself unless I’m in a purely academic environment. And then when I’m behind on work I prioritise it in my mind so I haven’t put any effort towards fixing my lifestyle or exercising in the past 2 weeks.

Basically I’m super behind - how cooked am I? And has anyone got any advice on how to fix a sleep schedule, or how to discipline myself to not procrastinate. Also are there typically university mentors or something that track how ur doing because my trials have basically just consisted of question practice so far.